Church

Church was awesome today. I also got to see a friend of mine who I haven't seen in a while so that was nice :) - I'm too tired to make any more comments on today.

I'm Old

Today is my birthday and I turned 20. That's the end of that :)

Today was also part two of Claire's Hen Party and it was so much fun!

My first job of the day was to collect balloons for the dinner table so I went to the local party shop and chose pink and silver balloons as well as an L plate balloon to tie to Claire's chair. Apparently I'm incapable of carrying eight balloons ten metres to my car and somehow managed to burst one on the way!

When I got home I got a quick visit from my sister and her family so they could give me my birthday card and a gift. It was really nice to see her because I haven't seen her since we met for the first time a few weeks ago (I'll explain that one another time!) The gifts they got me are just what I love! They got me a beautiful smelling candle with a little porcelain lampshade which sits on top of the candle to make it look like a little lamp! It's sooo cute! They also gave me a really beautiful bracelet which has two rows of black beads which are joined with a big black heart! It's really lovely :)

After they left I had a bath and got ready for going out for dinner. We got t-shirts made for everyone which said "Hen Party" with little stones. They looked great on everyone! I travelled to the cute Italian restaurant with my friend Ali and met my friend Emma outside. We went upstairs and decorated the table with the balloons and with table confetti. Emma also brought pictures of Claire when she was younger as well as a beautiful cake which we place in the centre of the table :) Claire loved it all and dinner was amazing.

After dinner we headed to the cinema to see "The Time Traveller's Wife" which was really confusing. My friends, Ali and Laura, and I sat discussing what was happening the whole way through cause we didn't really understand why the guy time travelled and why he was stuck in the year that he was and also why he could come back when he was dead or travel past the date of his own life. Who knows? It was a good movie if you don't think too much about the plot... ooh and I love Rachel McAdams. I think she's a great actress :)

Pamper Night

My friend Claire is getting married next week so tonight was part one of her hen party. We had a pamper night at her house with just a few friends and it was so much fun. I got my toenails done with french paint and they look lovely.

My friends, Ali and Emma, and I had been into the city centre today to buy items for Claire's party bag that we decided to make her... full of "essential" items that she would need for married life. Let's just say it was interesting to say the least.... I think it terrified Claire a bit though!

I'm tired now and tomorrow holds part two of her hen party so I'm going to sleep :)

Uni

I had to enrol for the second year of my university course today and I'm really excited about it.

Last year enrollment was really crazy because I was a first year student and everyone needed to verify who they were, their grades and all their other details. It took forever and included a three hour long wait in a small, stuffy corridor surrounded by hundreds of people who didn't know each other and were equally as annoyed and confused by the process as I was. Thankfully a couple of us found solidarity in that! I'm overjoyed that registration for this year was all done online and was much simpler!

I'm studying German with Theology at Queen's University in Belfast, which is also where I live. I major in German which means that I four classes each year in German and only two in Theology. I really love my course! I started off at uni studying German and Spanish but I dropped Spanish at Christmas because I was really bad at it and picked up Theology. I thought Theology would be simpler and easier to follow... which in some ways it is because it's in english at least but it's a bit hard to get your head around!

Because Queen's don't have their own Theology department they run the course through lots of different, smaller colleges. I chose to study at Belfast Bible College which is a Christian college. It's in a really nice setting and I really like it there but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have class with people who didn't believe the same things as I did. Sometimes being in a bit of a Christian bubble is a bit annoying.. but anyway! They give us free tea and cake every morning so that's a bonus!

Last year for Theology I took a class which studied the gospel of Mark. That class was really interesting to sit in but very confusing when it came around to the big assignment and the exam because I didn't really know what was happening. It all worked out alright though!

The second class I took was Introduction to Theological Thinking which I found extremely interesting but most of the time I found it difficult to follow and diffcult to remember what all of the different theologians thought because I had no background knowledge in church history and nearly everyone else did. I was a bit disadvantaged but I did alright in the exam and the assignment so it all worked out okay too!

I didn't really try at all to get anything out of Theology last year because I found it difficult starting a new college and trying to meet new people as well as starting a subject that I'd never studied before so I'm going to put in way more effort this year to actually learning something useful. Grades for last year didn't count anyway!

Sooo... what does this year hold? I'm taking four classes in German, two of which are compulsory language modules which include a bit of history and business, reading, writing, grammar and oral stuff which is usual with language courses. I didn't really mention much about German from last year because I just loved it all from start to finish. I love everyone doing the course and the classes were really great.

So yeah... I'm taking the language modules and I'm also taking two other modules. I don't know much about them yet apart from their titles. The first one is entitled "Religion in Modern Day Drama and Theatre" which sounds like it will be really interesting so I'm excited about that one! The second is about German Cinema and I know nothing about that. I don't study that one until after Christmas though so we've plenty of time to figure out what it's about.

As for Theology I'm taking a class called "The Christian Doctrinal Tradtion" which is compulsory I'm not very excited about it. It sounds like it might be as confusing as the theological thinking module from last year but I'll go in hopeful! The second module I'm taking is a church history module for the 16th century period which I am looking forward to more than I can tell you! It's going to be all about the Reformation and that's my favourite church history period.... maybe it's something to do with my love for German ;)

So that's what I'll be doing this year and once this year is over it's time for me to go off to Germany for my year abroad! I'm looking forward to it SO much but at the same time I'm terrifed :) but hey... we've still a while to go until that!

Oooh and I'm also taking a course in Modern Greek on Thursday evenings.... just for fun!

Breakthrough

I love those moments when life just seems to burst open the jar that it's been contained in because something new and exciting has happened and that jar that you've put life in just can't contain itself anymore.

:)

A New Adventure

Today I start something new and I'm really excited about it.

At church I'm part of a Bible School course that they run through the year. I started the course in January and at the time I had to make some major decisions. The decisions weren't really life or death but they would dictate how the next period of my life would look. I'd been helping out on Thursday nights with a group of kids in church and I'd also been attending a church youth group on Tuesdays. The course was taught on both Tuesday and Thursday nights so I didn't know what direction to go... to stay with the kids and the youth or to start attending the Bible School course. I chose Bible School because it seemed to make sense. What could be wrong with learning more about God? In retrospect, I think it was the wrong decision.

While attending the course in the first semester I struggled with paying for petrol to even get there and God's hand didn't seem to be upon my attendance. Usually I soak knowledge up like a sponge... I really love learning but every time I sat in the classes I couldn't take it in. It was like my mind was somewhere else. Which it was.... it was with the group of youth.

Bible School took a break at Easter and right through summer and I went back to attending the youth group every week. I didn't really talk to anybody but I just went there to meet with God and just to see what He was doing and I just knew that I should be part of that. I decided to seek His face some more before I made a decision because I didn't want to make any more mistakes.

Nearly six months have passed since then and I'm now taking a step in the direction that I feel I'm supposed to go. I'm really excited about how God is going to use me there and I'm really excited about imparting what I've learnt to them and also learning more from everyone else there. I dunno.. I just feel like I'm on the edge of something and I don't know where it's gonna take me.

Needless to say, I'm not going back to Bible School at this moment in time and I guess I just wanted to put a reminder for myself to not just choose the path which seems to make sense at the time but to seek God's face in everything.

Stress

I really hope today is the end of something.

Mark 4:30-32

Just some writing I did on this passage for Theology. I recently found it and thought I'd post it here with my other random thoughts.

This passage is only one of several parables in chapter four of Mark’s gospel which talk about the kingdom of God. This parable of the mustard seed is a teaching which is designed to encourage the disciples and to carry them through the somewhat small beginnings of the work they are about to embark upon. In some ways this passage shields the disciples from doubting the future power of the kingdom but with a closer look there are many other allusions within the text which, at first glance, are not so prominent, especially to the western eye.

In writing an exegesis of this passage we must first establish the type of writing and the genre of the text with which we are dealing. This particular writing is a parable which is set within chapter four of the gospel of Mark. A parable is defined by Webster’s dictionary as being a short story which is “designed to illustrate or teach some truth, religious principle or moral lesson”. We therefore must begin to look past the surface of what Jesus was teaching in order to find the true principle or lesson contained within the message. We must however be careful not to “change parables into allegories, seeking all sorts of complicated meanings where usually one great truth is to be found.”

Let us look first at the wider context of this passage. Directly before the text in question comes “The Parable of the Growing Seed” (Mark 4:26-29) which is unique to the gospel of Mark. Within this parable we learn that man is “responsible for sowing the kingdom message” but God is responsible for the results. It is interesting that this text appears only in Mark’s gospel but there is a possible explanation as to why it has been omitted from the other gospels. If we look at Luke 13:19 we are told that the kingdom is, “like a mustard seed, which a man took and put in his garden” and similarly in Matthew we are told the kingdom is, “like a mustard seed, which a man took and sowed in his field,”. However when we look at Mark 4:32 we are simply told that “it is sown”.

It is possible that the lack of the human agent (anthropos) in Mark’s account is made up for by the parable of the growing seed as it talks of man sowing seeds but God being responsible for the results. The use of ‘anthropos’ in the accounts of both Matthew and Luke is ultimately overshadowed as we are told of how God will finally bring the kingdom to power.

The sections before this include similar parables about the kingdom of God such as “The Parable of the Sower” (Mark 4:1-9) and “Light under a Basket” (Mark 4:21-25). Each of these parables are important as they give us different pieces of information about the kingdom. It is therefore fitting that they should be arranged side by side.

After the text we have two short verses (33 and 34) in which we learn how Jesus adapted his teachings to his listeners. These are two significant verses and I find it appropriate that they have been separated from the parables beforehand as the verses are written in reference to all of the parables used by Jesus and not just the parable immediately before.

After this, as we move towards the end of chapter four, we are told of how the wind and waves obey Jesus and into the beginning of chapter five of Mark’s gospel we learn of the demon-possessed man whom through Jesus received healing. Both passages appear to affirm Jesus’ authority and are appropriately placed in order to support the claims He makes about God’s kingdom in the preceding verses.

The text begins with the typical Markan introduction, “Then He said”. This phrase is used can be seen introducing the other parables contained within Mark 4 as well as frequently throughout the gospel as a whole. This is one of the many literary styles which Mark uses to give his writing an extremely fast pace and a sense of immediacy.

In verse thirty Jesus poses two questions to the listeners; “To what shall we liken the kingdom of God?” and “With what parable shall we picture it?”. It is obvious that Jesus is not asking these questions in order to receive a response from his audience but rather to show that the description he will give is not that of a literal sense but rather metaphorical. From these questions posed we can safely assume that the kingdom of God is not a literal mustard seed nor does it have physical roots and branches.

Jesus does however liken the kingdom to a mustard seed and we are told that when the mustard plant is fully grown it “shoots out large branches” and that birds will be able to “nest under its shade”. From knowledge of the plant in the form that we know, it seems that Jesus has got it completely wrong. However, if we do some research, we learn that at the time when Jesus spoke and in that particular location that we “can be certain that it became a tree”.

It is not just the transformation of the small mustard seed to the fully grown tree being likened to the small beginnings of the kingdom that caused Jesus to choose this unusual symbolism. We see the kingdom of God being referred to as a tree on many occasions in the Old Testament such as Psalm 104:12, Ezekiel 17:23, Ezekiel 31:6 and Daniel 4:12.

This particular parable may also have roots in John 15 as Jesus talks of himself as the vine and believers as the branches who are called to bear fruit. But what does it mean for us to be the branches of his kingdom and when exactly will the kingdom of God be fully realised on earth?

There are many stances on when the kingdom will come and there has been no resolution made. Many such as Schweitzer believe that we are only preparing for the end . This stance is further enhanced by many theologians such as Blutmann who suggest that although the kingdom hasn’t yet come, it still “wholly determines the present” in that we should see “every hour as the last”.
Others however, such as Dodd, believe that the kingdom of God has indeed already come. Most have taken this viewpoint from detailed studies of the original text of Mark 1:15 and claim that the text suggests an immediate coming of the kingdom.

It may however be more popular to take a stand on the middle ground in which we see the kingdom of God as a kingdom that did indeed arrive with Jesus but will continue to be built up until it becomes something great. Just as the mustard seed, the early church was started with few disciples but the gospel has continued to

spread. We just need to look at how many people have been reached today with just a few men.
Just like the growth of the mustard seed into a larger entity, we can see by looking at Mark 9:1 that it would take time before the kingdom of God was present with power. As branches we are called to be the hands and feet of the gospel. The kingdom of God is here but, just like the mustard seed needs to be physically planted in the ground before it can grow, we need to help plant the gospel in the hearts of men before God can do the work.

Apologetics

One of the areas of Theology I'm really interested in and love is Apologetics. I got interested in this area very early on in my Christian walk, simply because I had questions and wanted answers! Now I love this subject because through it I can help people with the same questions as I had. Philippians 1:17 has to be one of my favourite scriptures because it talks of how we have actually been appointed for the defence of the gospel and I love how 1 Peter 3:14-16 talks of how we should always be ready to give a reason for the hope that is in us. So today I thought I'd talk a little bit about Apologetics and why it's important!

The word “Apologetics” is a compound of two Greek words;

Apologia: verbal defence

Aoyikos: reasonable

Apologetics: reasonable verbal defence

Apologetics deals with answering critics who oppose or question the revelation of the word of God, of worship or manifestation of the work or acts of the Holy Spirit. We as believers need to give reason for what we believe. It is also a study that gives reason for the Christian faith and deals with why we believe what we believe and why we do what we do. To defend, we have to be knowledgeable or we won’t be able to present our case effectively and, as Christians are called to make a defence, this is important.

We need apologetics because;

• We are commanded to be able to give a defence of the faith to everyone who asks us.
• It helps to strengthen the faith of believers. Most of us have times when we question and doubt what we believe and apologetics gives us a foundation and reinforcement to our faith.
• There are so many false teachings that call for our attention that we need apologetics to affirm our faith as well as to stop the objections and attacks of those who are attempting to assault the faith.

Excuses in the Face of Evidence

Ignorance – this is only a valid excuse until the point that the person is given information about God. After that, we are not dealing with ignorance but with wilful rejection. (Romans 1:18-19 - "For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, because what may be known of God is manifest in them, for God has shown it to them.")

Pride – (1 Corinthians 1:26-27 - For you see your calling, brethren, that not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called. But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things which are mighty;)

Moral Reasons – people often reject the evidence for Christ, not because of any lack in the evidence but because they have a vested interest in unbelief. They do not want the Christian faith to upset their lifestyle. Some have attempted to overcome this objection by watering down the need for repentance. It is taught, “just believe the facts of the gospel and you will be saved” but Jesus preached a gospel that saved sinners from their sins. Jesus loves you the way you are but loves you too much to leave you the way you are. (John 3:19-20 - And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed.)

Don’t be afraid to reason! Don’t just live with questions – want answers for them!

Support

I pray that we wouldn't just play up our support for a few days or weeks. I pray our support would be real support and would be born out of actual love and actual concern for the wellbeing of this project that we're embarking upon. Let our support not fail like last time and allow us to rectify our previous mistakes.

Philippians 3:7-11

But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ.

Yet indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having my own righteousness , which is from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which is from God by faith; that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death, if, by any means, I may attain to the resurrection from the dead.

<3

Israel

is stalking me again. I really really want to go there.

Today

I don't feel settled about where I am and what I'm doing.

I so need to get down on my knees and seek God's face in this.

I can't afford to make a mistake because it could cost lives.

Help Lord.